The organism appears to be a bilaterally symmetrical insect larvae of some sort. It possesses a tan coloration, with translucent dorsal and ventral sides causing the insides to be slightly visible. This coloration might have something to do with the environment it inhabits, which may be subterranean. There exist slight ridges along the circumference of the body. These ridges expand and contract during movement, allowing the organism to extend its body forwards in an inching fashion similar to that of a caterpillar. There appears to be 8 nubby legs that provide little traction for movement and two black spots that exist close to the rostral end of the body. The tail is much darker than that of the rest of the body and the very tip of the tail is completely black. The 13mm long tail is roughly the same length as the 14mm body. This comparison between tail and body length raises the question of the tail's significance to the organism's survival. This organism appears to be blind, as obstruction of its potential viewpoint with a pen has no effect on its reaction. The organism, however, is very shy and will cease all movement and act dead if moved or touched. There still exist many questions about this organism that cannot be answered only through observation. What does this organism consume, and what may consume this organism? What type of environment does this organism inhabit? And is this organism at one certain stage of its lifecycle? These questions have potential answers with more in depth observation.
Comments
Improvement
1. When mentioning visual senses, you could add the fact that the organism was help in a clear container which could then lead to a different hypothesis in which it could have poor eyesight, thus bumping into the obstuction.
2. "The organism. however. is very shy..." Punctuation and capitalization correction for proper paragraphs is important.
3. Write paragraph in order of subtopics. Towards the front is the topic of coloration, then jumps to its shape and extremities, back to coloration.
Avoid anthropomorphizing
Being "shy", acting dead, possessing a coloration are all expressions that anthropomorphize the organism.