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Submitted by amdicicco on Thu, 11/15/2018 - 16:12

Ponds are freshwater bodies of water found all over the world. These ponds host all types of organisms ranging from unicellular organisms to multicellular organisms such as fish and frogs. In ponds, groups of living things depend on the water environment and each other for their own supplements and survival (Rejesh, 2017). If a pond has more "evenness" when it comes to diversity, it's system is going to be stronger, and better equipped for survival. By evaluating pond water samples from different ponds on The UMass Campus, we should see which pond is most diverse and therefore better equipped for survival. To test what pond has a higher Shannon Diversity Index, we gathered pond water samples from two locations. We counted the organisms, identified and classified the species, charted the numbers, and then calculated which pond had higher diversity.

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If this were a professional paper, you should expand "Umass Campus" to be the "University of Massachusetts Amherst". This is the name of the university and shouldn't be abbreviated. Also, "The Umass Campus" does not all need to be capitalized. 

msalvucci

Mon, 11/26/2018 - 14:35

Nice paragraph! I would expand on some details about the location of the pond that you tested the shannon diversity index. When you say, "we gathered pond water samples from two locations", I would then go on to say which locations you chose and why.