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PP Dog

Submitted by jnduggan on Fri, 10/26/2018 - 13:47

The Labrador is the one the most intelligent breeds of dogs on the planet. Their relaxed temperament and ability to learn quickly has proved them to be extremely versatile, yet widely competent dogs. They have an incredible sense of smell, and throughout history have been used for hunting and tracking. Labradors are also known to have the largest litters among any other breed, lending the vaccinated pregnant mother the highest chance to produce the most puppies. Maximizing the output of puppies from a mother is the most logical decision because in order to increase the density of dogs on the planet, the growth rate must be large. In order to maximize the growth rate, we must pick an animal that will grow exponentially while also producing the highest output of puppies in their lifetime.

 

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Comments

I think you should switch the tense of "proved" to "proven." Also in the last sentence, I think a comma should maybe be added after "exponentially." Maybe also add an opening sentence where you introduce the different strengths of labradors without going into them yet.

In the sentence "In order to maximize the growth rate, we must pick an animal that will grow exponentially while also producing the highest output of puppies in their lifetime." rather than stating that this is simply an animal, specify that we are focusing on a breed of dog.