One of the most important aspects of the science community is the ability to replicate processes and get the same results. In order to be able to achieve this goal, clear and concise writing is required. In Fall 2018 the Writing in Biology Class at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, conducted a project to observe differences between two figures. Figure 1 was to be created by me and Figure 2 was to be created by another student following my methods section to try to create a perfect replicate of the Figure I already created. The following section focuses on the subject of the figure, including why it was selected, and the factors that were attempted to be controlled in the writing of the methods section
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Perfect Paragraphs
Each week, post your own Perfect Paragraph and comment on three Perfect Paragraphs. Suggest improvements. Don't just say "Looks good."
Recent comments
- Looks good! I think it would 6 years 1 week ago
- Looks good! It might be 6 years 1 week ago
- Looks good! Maybe add a 6 years 1 week ago
- Unless this was done in a 6 years 1 week ago
- Rather than saying your 6 years 1 week ago
- Clarification regarding comments 6 years 1 week ago
- I think the scientific names 6 years 1 week ago
- I would proofread for grammar 6 years 1 week ago
- I think the first comma in 6 years 1 week ago
- Well written paragraph. My 6 years 1 week ago
Comments
Punctuation
The only things I could pick out of this paragraph were the comma in your third sentence ("...Biology class at the University of Massachusetts...") has an unnecessary comma after "Amherst" and you forogt a period at the very end of your paragraph.
Clarity
The clarity of the sentences doesn't always show through, a better use of punctuation would help this problem.
I would consider cutting down
I would consider cutting down some of the sentences, they are a little wordy and lengthy in some areas.