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Snapping shrimp draft

Submitted by curbano on Sun, 09/30/2018 - 21:46

Sonic hunting is the way shrimp use sound to hunt prey. The water is squeezed between the shrimp's claw and it shoots out with a little void behind it. The water expands outward and it becomes a little gas bubble pocket. The gas expands until the surrounding water puts pressure on it and the temperature increases and the bubble pops and kills surrounding organisms. They also use snapping to communicate with other shrimp. During WWII, the navy would hide their submarines in the beds of these shrimp so submarines of enemy ships could not find them. They also used the sounds to distract enemy ships and make them confused. Researchers are now trying to find a way to use bubbles to save lives. They used bubbles to get through the blood-brain barrier, a wall to protect unwanted cells/molecules from entering the brain. The bubbles help doctors fight cancerous tumors. Bubble power can possibly help us fight diseases.

 
 
 

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My only suggestion would be to turn some of your smaller sentences into complex sentences. For example you could change "They used bubbles to get through the blood-brain barrier, a wall to protect unwanted cells/molecules from entering the brain. The bubbles help doctors fight cancerous tumors" into "They used bubbles to get through the blood-brain barrier, a wall to protect unwanted cells/molecules from entering the brain, these bubbles help doctors fight cancerous tumors".