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The Trial of Socrates

Submitted by mmaliha on Tue, 09/11/2018 - 14:44

Over and over, Socrates mentions that "[he] differ[s] from the majority of men" (29). And, this fault is what eventually leads him to his death sentence. As humans, we like what/who is familiar to us. Thus, any new value or school of thought must be introduced to us as a renovation of old, or in relatable manner. Socrates either willingly refuses or unwillingly fails to achieve this purpose. In the beginning of his speech, he disclaims that he is not accustomed to speaking in the familiar language of court and jurymen must focus on the content rather than the manners of his speech.  But, I am once again reminded, as a legal studies major, how hard it is to accomplish this feat.

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Comments

When reading this aloud, it sounds as if some of your scentences are a little choppy and incomplete. For example, your first two sentences could be fused together rather than starting the second sentence with "And" you could remove the period and just make it one sentence.

Like the previous comment stated, the first and second sentence could be joined together and it would flow a lot better. Also the last sentence has too many commas, and you could probably just remove the comma after the word "reminded". 

For a legal studies major this is very well written and has depth but for biology, there is too much sentiment and passive tone. An example is  "As humans, we like what/who is familiar to us. Thus, any new value or school of thought must be introduced to us as a renovation of old, or in a relatable manner."  Your use of "must be" creates doubt in the reader to improve this I would suggest replacing "must be" with "is" to make it a true statement.

I am not sure if you should use /'s when writing. The content of the paragraph is well, but I feel like you need some sort of conclusion at the end. It's very open ended.