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Brain eating Amoeba pp

Submitted by yurigarcia on Tue, 10/23/2018 - 16:02

Amoeba is a single cell organism that likes to live in warm places, they were first discovered in Australia but this brain eating Amoeba is believed to have evolved in the U.S. Only this past month a man in Texas died because of a brain infection called Primary Amebic Meningoencephalitis. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), Amoeba is a microorganism that can be found in lakes, ponds, and pools. The infection occurs, when the contaminated water enters the body through the nasal cavity. It is by this route that the parasite reaches the brain and destroys the brain tissue. It is estimated that only a dozen people in the world have survived the infection. Usually, an anti-parasitic drug called Miltefosine is given to treat the patients and in 2013 this medication saved two lives. The only recommendation is to keep the water out of your nose, when swimming in fresh water by covering your nose with your hands. 




In the first sentence you used a comma ("..likes to live in warm places, they were first...") These two ideas seem o be sepearate thoughts and could either be separated by a period or a semicolon. Also, the comma in your last sentence ("...your nose, when swimming...") is unnecessary and you could delete it without effecting the structure of the sentence.

I would break the first sentence into two sentences as they seem to have different subjects. Where you put a comma, I would put a period and break up the sentences. There is also an unneccasary comma in the sentence that begins with "The infection occurs,", this comma is not needed and should just be one coherent sentence.