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AQ 11/1 Perfect Paragraph

Submitted by atquang on Fri, 11/01/2019 - 13:15

Today is Halloween, which means dining halls at the University of Massachusetts - Amherst will be preparing for their annual fresh lobster special. Fresh lobsters must be prepared in a particular way. Seafood should always be prepared with extra care because shellfish is a common allergen to the public. One topic that is talked about around lobsters is their innate ability to be immortal. Biological immortality in lobsters is expressed through the telomerase gene. When DNA is replicated, we lose DNA at the ends of our chromosomes (telomeres). Studies have linked the shortage of telomeres with aging. Telomerase is an enzyme that reduces the loss of telomeres. 



I'm not sure if the hyphen after University of Massachusetts is needed.

The last sentence explaining what telomerases are should appear earlier to give context as to what lengthens telomeres.

"Studies have linked" sounds like personification of the studies, cite specific authors and studies instead for your evidence